Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 09:23 PM CST [General]
Ok so when I was with my ex husband. I could never ever get him to tell me any of his feelings. I mean I could be on my death bed and he probably wouldn't say boo to me. All I wanted was a guy that would just let me know every once and a while how much i meant to them or whatever.
So I meet this new guy. We start dating. He tells me how much I mean to him and all this other stuff. I was like awesome there are guys out there that actually tell girls their feelings. Well then it got to be way too much. I think we were together maybe 2 weeks and he told me he loved me. then at 3 weeks he had our wedding planned and the names of our kids. by 5 weeks he was looking for a place for us to live together. By this time I'm feeling a little suffocated. He would never give me time to myself when my kids were at their dads i had to spend all that time with him. finally i told him i wanted a night to myself. he freaked out on me. he freaked out on me when i told him i wanted a girls night out. he was gonna come and find me at the bar that night and just randomly stop by and say hi. are you kidding me??
Needless to say I broke up with him after 2 months last night. I couldn't take it anymore. He was suffocating me and driving me up a wall. I started to lose interest in him and was not attracted to him what so ever. So ever since I told him that it was over. He has become total stalker boy. He will not stop emailing me. I think he has wrote me 30 emails at least today. I just don't know what to do anymore.
He reminds me so much of Janice from FRIENDS. I think I need to be Chandler and move to Yemin! LOL I just can't get it through this guys head. And to top it all off he is 4 years older than me!
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 07:23 PM PST [General]
Wow!! I can't believe August is practically over. Summer is going to end soon =(
I love having days off during the week. It's a nice break. We had some Chipotle today. Yum that was delicious. We went to go visit his cousin at the hospital to see her newborn. A baby boy 8 pounds 2 oz and 23 in. I know right!! Can't wait til we decide to have kids =) Happy Hump day everyone!!
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 10:18 PM EST [General]
Hey everyone! Here are my thoughts and opinions on last night's ECW...
The first match was amazing! It was freakin' incredible! It was a six-man tag team match with John Morrison and The Miz teaming up with Chavo Guerrero vs Evan Bourne, Super Crazy and Tommy Dreamer. I think Super Crazy and Tommy Dreamer are extremely underrated! The match was awesome. There was a bunch of high-flying going on in this match....MY FAVORITE! Super Crazy did an awesome standing moonsault on Morrison. It was cool to see Tommy Dreamer get in there and clear the ring! My favorite part of the match was when Super Crazy flew out of the ring and then Evan jumped out too. It was awesome! That crowd went crazy and even started chanting ECW! ECW! ECW! I had chills all over!
Next match was Ricky Ortiz vs another new guy, Gavin Spears. Ortiz was a little better but I still wasn't really into this match.
Finlay and Hornswoggle came out so that Finlay could talk about Mike Knox. He says how Knox has been saying that he's gone soft lately and gives Knox a chance to come to the ring and be face-to face. Knox makes his way out and says that he'll take him on when he feels like it. Finlay goes after him and they start to beat on each other. When it started to get out of hand, the referees started to come out and pull them apart. It was crazy! They looked like they were really trying to hurt each other.
Last match of the night was a SummerSlam rematch with Matt Hardy and Mark Henry for the ECW title. It started off a little boring to me but the end was pretty intense. Matt had a few 2 counts on Henry. Hardy was able to hit Mark with an awesome Moonsault. I thought he had it won but Mark was able to beat Hardy with the "World's Strongest Slam". Bummer! I really thought this was Matt's time to be Champion.
Shrewsbury Renaissance Faire is coming soon! And, Sir Mikel needed
new garb. So I found this interesting Butterick pattern with
traditional cryptic directions and obscure pictures. Here are the
results of my experiment into arcane sewing lore.
Later I will
attempt a 15th century Burgundian/Italian Courtepy with it's signature
knee-length open sleeves. I have a forest green velvet material and the
accompanying maroon tapestry fabric for the open sleeve innerlining.
This pattern is more than a simple vest with capped sleeves, decorative ribbon, and embroidery, but less than a doublet. The vest is also fully lined as a doublet would be.
The matching felt hat is based on the traditional muffin hat, again with additional decoration.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 09:03 PM CST [General]
HE'S BACK
Everybody I knew it. Because the WWE without The Undertaker is like Triple H not being called The Game. You know what I mean. Anyway since he came back faster that I thought I will be closing the polls and I'll change the name of the group, I would like for you leave comment or write me on what we as a group should rename it. Oh and remember to invite you other friends so they can check the group out and maybe join. See you
"Be not proud. The spirit of the Undertaker lives within the soul of all mankind. The eternal flame of life that cannot be extinguished. The origin of which cannot be explained. The answer lies in the everlasting spirit. Soon all mankind will witness the rebirth of The Undertaker. I will NOT Rest In Peace." ~Undertaker, Royal Rumble, 1994
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 07:03 PM PST [General]
Here are two of my bestest friends in the whole world!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My two sisters...........they have always been there for me, they're twins!!! I love them soooooooooo much and having them be a part of my wedding in November............hint.............hint...........would just be sooooooo wonderful! Please help make our dream wedding come true??????
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 10:03 PM EST [General]
We all know that a complete, well-balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, complex carbohydrates, vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants - is a solid foundation for good nutrition and optimal health.
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Visit my site again next week for some more food for thought.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 09:58 PM EST [Rune Musings]
In order to clear a few misconceptions up about runes, I am going to do a few 101 blogs on the subject.
History of Runes
Runes are a system of writing, divination and magick that probably originated sometime before 200 b.c.e. (the earliest dated runic artifact found.) It is the second oldest known form of divination in the world. (Artifacts with the Chinese I Ching have been found that are several centuries older than the Runic artifacts.) All legends surrounding the discovery of the runes are directly related to the Norse god, Odin, who sacrificed Himself for nine days upon Yggdrasil, the Tree of Life, before He drew the runes up from the roots of Yggdrasil. In the Havamal, also called the sayings of the High One, Odin says:
"Nine nights long I hung upon the windy tree
pierced by my own gar
sacrificed unto Odin, myself unto myself.
no drinking horn nor bread
offered me as I hung upon that tree from
from whose roots no man
knows whence they spring. Looking down
I seized the runes
Screaming I fell back again."
This is how the origins of the runes are explained. It was the sacrifice of a great god who embarked upon a shamanic journey into the roots of life itself that brought back these signs of primal energy we call runes. Diana Paxton in her wonderful rune curriculum/book Taking Up the Runes suggests that Odin may have brought more than those twenty four we now know up but gave to humanity only twenty four. That would be typical of Odin to give us only part of the runes He discovered and perhaps give to other realms little bits and pieces of other runes. He is a clever God and had to put the meanings of the runes into terms we humans could understand. The word rune itself comes from the root reu, a Proto-Indo-European word meaning to roar. Its meaning changes in the languages of Northern Europe from the German raunen (to whisper) to the Old Irish run and Middle Welsh rhin (both meaning secret or mysterium.) Even today, the meaning of the word rune has changed among some facets of culture to simply mean a mysterious or magickal symbol.
The set of runes are called the Futhark. "Futhark" is what the first six runes spell in our common language. The Futhark is divided into three sets of eight runes, called Aetts. Each aett is named after the first rune of its set so we have a Fe or Fehu Aett, Hagalaz or Hagall Aett and a Tiwaz or Tyr Aett. Please note that I used two different but similar words for the first runes of each aett. Runes are known more commonly by their Germanic names ( Fehu, Hagalaz and Tiwaz) than they are by the Old Norse names (Fe, Hagall and Tyr.) For the sake of conformity, most people seem to use use the Germanic names for the runes here since most literature and runesters today use that language for the runes. I was once in a group discussion with the author of a book on sacred wells of Ireland and England and tried to explain that we Norse have sacred waters as well as a rune of water. I repeatedly said the rune "logr" to blank faces, some who were well versed in runes then I showed them the hand stadha (hand sign language) for the rune and they all nodded and said "ahhh, laguz!" I learned runes using the Old Norse and had a communication problem until I learned the Germanic names!
Runes survived for over two thousand years of Christian attempts to erase them from the earth along with the Pagan faiths that held them dear. How did the runes survive such a long campaign of disinformation and blood letting? All across Northern Europe, Ireland, Scotland and England there are huge standing stones with runic charms and words written on them. Some mark boundaries, deaths of great people, or events that were not supposed to be forgotten. Tools, jewelry and weapons have survived with the runes inscribed in them. The 9th century manuscript "Abecedaium Nordmannicum" and the 14th century "Codex Runicus" were both written in runes and survived. It is the common man's keeping of runes that is truly remarkable, though, for they used runes in the structure of their houses in Germany for so many centuries that even the builders forgot why they built things the way they did. In Europe, runes were used as House Marks for the great houses as well as a way to identify property and boundaries.
Because of the Christian persecution, by the 1800s there were but a few runesingers left, mostly in remote parts of Scandinavia. The Runic Mysteries remained alive in the traditions and lore of secret societies in Germany until Guido Von List, a great German mystic, brought them back into the light of day in the early 1900s after what he described a "spontaneous runic initiation". Von List was a bigot but he sparked the modern Runic Revival. He wrote the Armanen Orden that is used to this day by some German mystics and others. Twenty years after von List's death in 1919, the Nazis tried their nasty hands at rune magic and came up with the true "Aryan" symbol, the fylfot or swastika. Perhaps it was a good thing they didn't know a lot about the runes because they reversed the Fylfot ( a kind of magical Runic symbol for success and achievement) and ended up wearing the symbol of failure on all their neatly pressed uniforms!
In 1955, another German magician, Spiesberger, published two books on runes minus bigotry and racism. They were Rune Magic and Rune Exercises for Everyone. Spiesberger did not use the traditional runes (his Futhark consisted of only 18 runes!) but he brought runes into the modern era. In 1973 Sveinbjorn Beinteinsson established the first official Asatruar troth in Iceland and the true research and recovery of the ancient runes began. There are now Rune Guilds all over the world.
Where do the runes go from here? Whatever the runes were when the Alfather found them, their ultimate use is written in the Voluspa, another Heathen writing carried down through the ages like the Eddas and the Havamal:
"Again the Aesir meet
on the Idha plain,
and speak of the mighty\
Midgardh serpent,
and remember again
the mighty World Doom
and Fimbultyr's (Odhinn's)
elder runes."
(Stanza 59)
And, so, it seems, that the runes play a serious purpose in the defense of the world of order and good. Interesting, huh?
On an experiential note, one of the areas few rune writers and teachers cover is the personal gnosis of the runic path. This is a natural progression for those who work a long time with runes. Runes become a kind of key to doors we did not know were there until we bump up against them in meditation and spiritual journeys. We find truths about ourselves and both the mundane and higher planes by using runes as guides and focus points. In my study groups, everyone is required to do rune meditations. For example, everyone will have to do a rune meditation on Fehu/Fe and the results will surprise all the participants to the point they will wonder if they were all really meditating on the same rune!
To understand why this happens, we return to the story of how the runes were discovered. Odin went on a shamanic journey to find the runes. We never really know if He meant to look specifically for the runes but that is what the Universe gave Him. A shamanic journey of that proportion requires sacrifice and discomfort. Odin hung upside down on Yggdrasil, the Tree of Life, for nine days and nights, fasting and deep in vision. Even after He brought the runes up from the roots of Yggdrasil, He had to put them in terms humans could understand. Like spoken language, words can mean something different depending on the life experience and culture a human has come from. For example, the word "creek" can mean a waterway that is only two feet wide and six inches deep in one part of the country and, in another part of the same country, mean a waterway that is a hundred feet wide and dozens of feet deep! Runes reveal themselves to a person in a way that person can grasp. While runes have specific base meanings, they are keys to open different doors for different people. It is my belief that the runes offer to a seeker in direct proportion to what the seeker offers to obtain the information of a particular rune.
Odin frequently is referred to as the Shamanic God because of His thirst for knowledge. He even gave up an eye for a sip of water from a sacred well that bestowed special gifts upon Him! He sacrificed much for knowledge. He continually seeks knowledge by voyaging among the realms, including Midgardhr, our realm. Understanding Odin's association with the runes is crucial to understanding the runes themselves and why they have survived for two thousand years. Sacrifice and thirst for knowledge brought the runes to us. What we do now with them in our individual experiences determines how much truth we learn about ourselves, our realms and each other.
Hope this helps a few people who have had questions about the origins of runes.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 09:58 PM EST [General]
una de estas es que la moderacion , no quiere que nadie piense por si solo,
uno tiene que ir de acuerdo a lo que ellos tienen por sistema evangelico, si alguien viene y les pone con la biblia lo errado que es el sistema evangelico , basta con
banear a las personas , eso es falta de honradez ,delante de DIOS al que dicen amar y servir ,
en estos dos lugares usted podra leer algunos temas biblicos
pero asegure su cinturon pues quizas lo que para usted es verdad biblica , sea tan solo una fantasia o una herencia tradicional de pensamientos dados por siglos enteros
hay gente que prefiere que usted continue siendo una persona ignorante ,
si usted es ingnorante es manipulada facilemente , una persona sin conocimiento biblico \
facilmente es manipulada por los mercaderes de la palabra
Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 08:54 PM CST [General]
Today I responded to a Craigslist trade ad. I'm not even sure why I felt qualified, but alas I responded. This woman wanted me to write a letter requesting a raise higher than the average for next review... in return a 1 hour massage. Not bad, right? I mean, I haven't had a massage in about 2 years, so I think I'm due.
Besides, I have done this sort of thing for several classes. There are books, templates, and articles all about this sort of thing. With a little bit of research and some good editing, I should be able to pop out an intelligent letter!
She sent me all her information and after mulling over the information while I watched the kids play at the lake all afternoon, I went to work on it this evening. I quickly finished a rough draft that requires some input and information from her to make it final. So, I sent my 1st draft off in the text of the e-mail. I was thinking... am I just handing her the "goods" without the return? However, I promised her that I'd get it printed nice once we have everything in order and hand her a hard-copy on the date of the massage. I suppose there is nothing more I can do to protect myself. Oh well...
It feels a little bit weird to consider myself a writer. I've been paid for many different jobs and recently I've been doing anything to make that extra buck. I've sold random items for my landlord, pulled extra shifts, sold our things, painted, and done some photography. Thankfully, I've been paid for each job and this has given me a new sense of pride. I can make money, I just have to think "out of the box".
So, I'm new to the site. I just signed up yesterday. I was hoping this would be a good way to meet other people with narcolepsy and discuss it. I was diagnosed in 2006. At the time I lived and worked in Louisville, KY at a mortgage company. The stress was getting to me of working long days for 100% commission. I started having frequent attack of cataplexy, but at the time I didnt know what it was. Turns out it is a dead giveaway that one has narcolepsy. Cataplexy is a sudden involuntary loss of muscle tone when one experience a sudden change like laughter or excitement. Its like the helpless feeling of being tickled, plus it looks like youre passing out so its kind of embarassing. Make that extremely embarassing. Additionally, I was starting to have sleep paralysis a lot. Thats a fun condition. It consists of your body awakening while your brain is asleep, and results in you lying there in your bed, half awake half asleep, unable to move and having vivd hallucinations like a hippy at woodstock. Seriously, I think people would pay big money to trip like I do naturally. It usually looks like I can see something out of my peripherals, think predator with his invisible camoflouge on, moving around or creeping up next to me and talking in my ear. Sometimes, when positioned where I cant really look around, it literally feels like something is crawling in bed next to me, scooting right up next to me, and whispering sweet nothings in my ear, usually about killing me and/or me going to hell. And since your brain is literally dreaming with your eyes open, it all seems very real but you cant convince your brain its just a dream. Scary stuff, really. So I'm prescribed Provigil to help me stay awake and Xyrem to help me sleep uniterrupted through the night. Both work okay, but the provigil makes me poop and also makes me lose my appetite for the next 8 hours or so. No complaints about the xyrem (liquid manufactured ghb) except the taste (kind of like I'd expect urine to taste). I had to quit that job since I couldnt handle it physically or mentally and I moved back to lexington and now work a job that requires me to be on my feet, and thus more attentive usually. A few months back I was reasearching some stuff about narcolepsy online and came across a doctors name at the university of kentucky, which I can practically see from my front porch, and how he had done some type of research on the disease. Although he's a neurologist, I figured it couldnt hurt to call him. He was excited to talk with me and I met him at his office where he kicked me the idea of being in a study he was proposing at the time to a medical board. The study involves studying how the brain works with REM sleep when one faints or passes out, and I was apparently a prime candidate since narcoleptics spend roughly 3x as much of our sleep in REM mode. His study has since been approved and we should be proceeding with the expirement any day now (the equipment hes using is new to him and hes making sure its all working properly before we proceed- we want to do this right). I'm happy to do it because 1) I'm getting paid for it and 2) anything to learn more about my disease, which seems virtually unresearched according to what I've read up on it. Every site says the same basic things. So, anyone else need a nap?